All those predictions of romance and all for naught

So I'm reading Mystic Medusa (no permalink) and come across this:

"So, for over 10 years I have been reading about my sign, Aquarian.
This week is the last straw for me! Yet another hint of romance, yet another tantalising suggestions of "exciting love activity".
How is it I am now 40 and still alone. It is shameful to say but I have had only 1 brief 2 year relationships in those 40 years.
Now I know that having romance forecast in our star sign won't overcome obstacles such as having 2 heads, highly visible scars or still wearing the pyjamas that the psychiatric hospital gave you. I am reasonably presented, educated, professional female. I really do fit the standard Aquarian mould and feel very comfortable with that.
And yet I haven't had so much as a cuppa of coffee with a man in nearly 15 years.
I'm think I'm fairly robust emotionally, but I must say reading your weekly hints and suggestions of romance and love - and then living yet another ordinary week is getting me down.
What to do ?
Can I adopt a new star sign ?
Miss Ted Seven"

"Dear MIss Ted Seven,
Hmm. Fix the Feng Shui? Get a rose quartz? The Venusian bra trick? A new bed? I cannot understand this. All I can imagine is that you have hopelessly high standards? If you have friends you can have a boyfriend. A man-friend. A bloke. Whatever. I mean, you are clearly sociable...Perhaps you are lurking about with these friends of yours too much?"

1. I love that someone finally said, "Every time I get a forecast of romance, it never fucking happens."
2. What the heck is "the Venusian bra trick?" Does it involve pulling rabbits out of your tits? Or perhaps some of the Upper-Class Twits of the Year?
3. Not everyone wants to date their male friends...and who says the male friends want to date her either? (Dating guy friends has equaled nothing but badness for me, which is why almost all of my guy friends are of the married/taken/not gonna come on to me variety.)

I wouldn't say being an Aquarius means you get relationships (god knows my Aquarian ex and Aquarian ex-best-friend got a LOT of play), but you're probably just not that into them. So it wouldn't surprise me. As a Taurus, however, I have no excuse :P