Nodes again

"The prevailing theory over the past decade or so is that the South Node represents the issues you resolved in a past life or, alternatively, what you brought into this incarnation with you, while the North Node represents your challenges in this lifetime and the lessons you need to learn. Astrologers have become increasingly dissatisfied with this explanation and are coming up with alternatives.
Michael Lutin, who has done extensive work on the nodes, believes they represent behavioral patterns programmed at an early age and what you need to do to break the cycle. I know that many of you weren't impressed with his book, Sunshines, but it blew me away. I picked it up again the other day and reread what he wrote about my South Node. He was right on the money — which is my key issue, with South Node in Taurus on the IC.
Every attempt I've made in my adult life to find security via a full-time job with benefits has failed miserably, to the point that I've gotten a complex about it. But what I've realized, finally, is that it's not going to work, and it's never going to work, because that is not what is going to fulfill me. Or, we might say, it's not my destiny.
A quick check of the charts of some friends and clients tells me that I may be onto something here. A friend of mine (you know who you are, sweetie) complained to me recently that her life has been a never-ending series of doing things for others and that she has had no time or energy to pursue her own passion. Her South Node is in Virgo in the seventh house. It seems that we are all having a South Node crisis. We are being dragged down into patterns that we've repeated over and over that have never served us and never will.
What is keeping us from going in that direction we need to go? In my case, fear is the only explanation. Fear is a primal reaction — a first-chakra response, within the domain of Pluto and Mars, whose two moons are Phobos and Deimos (Fear and Panic). And it seems there is only one antidote for fear, and that is being thrown into the situation that one is most afraid of.
So here we all are, forced to endure what we fear will kill us.
The question, of course, is how do we break this cycle? Michael Lutin's recommendation is essentially "just do it." I don't believe this is possible without an intermediary step.

We can start by integrating our own internal polarization. The key, I believe, is not to repress or abandon your South-Node tendencies — which in any case would not be possible — but to integrate them with your North Node destiny. Some things seem mutually exclusive until you see the bigger picture."

Hmmm, not a bad idea.

I am having node issues (so to speak) of late myself. Well, I'm not exactly doing a LOT to change it right now (say, if I was forcing myself at gunpoint to date online, that would count), but I'm having kind of a sea change where my heart's desires are coming back...and I don't like them or want to act on them. It really stinks.